Shattered
I don’t think I have ever been so downcast or depressed regarding any exam results compared with this. I got a B+ (Economics), a B (General Studies), a B- (Accountancy), a C (Mathematics S) and a C- (Malay language). First, the bad part: I failed one of the papers in Malay, pulling my grade down to a C-. What was one of my hopes for an A became the lowest grade in my result slip. The other paper had a what-must-be-very-strong B+, but the F for my written portion makes no sense - I was top of my class. I’m appealing.
Then there is Economics. I was so hoping I would get at least an A-, instead a B+ is what I get. If I didn’t get an F in that paper and got an A- in this paper, a cummulative GPA of 3.0 and above is feaible. Instead, it’s 2.55.
I didn’t go to Singapore hence - spending so much money on visiting universities I have a very very slim chance of getting in does not entice me. Everyone is congratulating me but to me, I most certainly could do much better. I really want to resit my STPM, I know I could improve my grade dramatically.
The good news is the Maths. While in my trials and every school exam since 2002, I have failed Mathematics. And this time, I got a C. Which means my average score is in the region of 50s or 60s (out of 100). For someone who struggled previously to get double-digit percentages, this is great news. What’s better, I got a B+ (that’s B-plus) for my Mathematics Paper 2 (which was Statistics and Business Mathematics) - which means I got my marks within the range of 80s or the high 70s.
That’s two weeks of work. Imagine what I could do with 6-7 months of work? I got a D+ in the first paper, which is calculus and other assorted nightmares - not stellar, but consider, the last test, I scored 5 marks. To get a D, I need at least 40 percent marks.
Everyone is congratulating me, somehow it being a big achievement (my Singapore-Cambridge A-Level best friend pointed out that if converted roughly on a Nottingham basis to A-level results, it’s 3A’s and 2B’s) but still, I could have done much better. I’m just so freaking depressed. I think I’ll gain a few kilos the next couple of weeks.